I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
pop tarts are not kleenex
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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