She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
