jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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