once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
