Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
