i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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