I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
