loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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