I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
