Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
