At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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