normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
