Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize