Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
