when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
wanna go halves on a baby?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
