She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
