apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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