Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
