my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
