Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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