so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
