God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
