is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize