It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
