Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
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