Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
