: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
