i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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