three words: i give head
three words: not that well
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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