this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize