its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
