Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
