if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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