if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Randomize
