Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
