i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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