i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
