Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
