i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
