Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
