this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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