So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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