You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
you didnt know i had herpes?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize