What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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