I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
