question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Couch. On fire.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
