we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
