Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
