i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You ate ashes out of my bong
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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