i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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