Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm going to jail i love you
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Floor bacon is actually really good
Randomize
