Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
