also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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